Hey! This young lady Jia Hui is translating the keitai shousetsu Koizora over here at http://jiahuishousetsutranslation.blogspot.com/ - check it out. Koizora isn't high art or anything, but you'll be able to see pretty quick why I fell in love with the format. Also, it corrected my spelling of shousetsu, which I believe is the most accurate or at least the spelling most often used by folks in the know.
getting back to fairview is weird its not like i had some super-great time at my parents or anything like that
but its like i miss it at home already even though im kind of glad to be back at fairview in this way that i completely cannot explain
but mostly im just pretty bummed out that greg wasthe only guy i really hung out with the whole time i was there
i mean no one else even called me back at all or whatever and that pretty much sucked so when
i go back up into the dorm richies back and i hang out with him for awhile and thats pretty cool cuz hes not being a dick
and we talk about how weird home was and how no one would hang out with me cuz of the gun thing and it comes to my mind
that richie totally did not give a shit about the gun thing at all which was awesome and even though hes a creep in other ways
i guess i am too or whatever so hes talking about his time at home and how he didnt hang out with anybody either and it was lonely
and strange and he doesnt
talk about his parents at all except to say that they hardly exist anymore which is fine with him
and i think about how my folks really arent there at all either but im still not totally cool with that but then again
im not sure what i do want cuz if they were in my shit all the time id probably freak out anyway
the most surprising thing is that richie goes -this may sound weird but i think that maybe we should
-like try to make more friends- and thats kind of what i was feeling too but i totally didnt expect that from richie and i tell him
and he goes all sheepish like he got caught doing something -yeah i know but its like you know i totally
-get sick of just hanging out with you all the time- and im like –thanks- and he goes –no no i know you get sick of me too-
and i say -yeah totally especially when you say shit like that- he scoffs -its not about that its more like just idk
-trying harder everybody here cant be a total smackhead you know- and im like
–what happened to you over break that made you come back all like mary poppins-
he sighs -idk i just thought maybe that theres a way to be like healthier you know- shrugs -idk- so i go
-okay lets try to be like more social justin can be pretty cool- and richies like -the kid with the hair- and he makes this big
swooping motion over his face and im like -yeah- and he goes -well i mean yeah we gotta try right itll be like an experiment-
so we go through school and stuff the next couple of days and i can see that richies trying really hard
not to be as much of an asshole like in class he doesnt call guys out on
being dumbasses as much
and in the dorm he starts hanging out in the common room more even though he just reads and doesnt say anything
so the one night the 40s are out and guys are taking hits off the bong and theres this time travel movie on the flatscreen and
guys start talking about time travel and richie puts his book down for like the first time ever and listens
and im drinking with justin on one of the couches and frejean blurts out totally baked -time travel would be awesome-
big bald tyshawn goes
–hells yes go back to the 60s do nothing but smoke weed trip balls and get my dick sucked-
frejean responds -id go back to gladiator times thats my favorite shit get me a big-ass sword some slave bitches some wine
-pretty sweet son- then richie suddenly cuts in -you cant go back in time- and all of them look over at him kind of shocked
that he even talked frejean scoffs -no shit sherlock but fuckin what if you know fuckin what if- richie throws his arm over
the back of the chair hes in and goes -no no i mean you can absolutely travel in time no doubt you just cant go back
-you can only travel forward in time- blank stoned looks in return richie hikes himself up in the chair -time is a river right it just keeps flowing along
-but as soon as you notice a moment its past you it flowed by you the past isnt behind us its way out in front of us far far away-
tyshawn takes a sip off his 40 -so if you cant go back in time how do you travel forward-
richie smiles -well you know were actually travelling forward in time right now and now and- points -now-
frejean scowls -aw fuck you man thats all you got- richie shakes his head -naw im just being a dick- and im kind of amazed by that
-to travel forward in time all you ultimately have to do is somehow get out of the river of time out of the flow of time
-and just wait for time to pass by you and then like jump back in- he shrugs -you just have to find a way out of the flow which is a bitch-
this kid tyler all glassy-eyed murmurs -yr kind of blowing my mind right now- frejean actually seems interested
- so what could take somebody out of the time stream- and richie goes
-well death- frejean scowls again
-no doubt fuckhead- and richie leans in hard -no listen what if death takes you out but you find a way to stay aware after death
-what if you stay you and you come back in the future just in a different body with a different name- richie shakes his head in amazement
-wouldnt that be like travelling in time- tyshawn turns and points at richie accusingly -i got
-no idea what yr talking about right now dude none- and richie just gets up shrugs at me with his hands open and leaves
tyshawn and frejean go back to talking about fucking past-bitches and i help justin finish the 40 and head back to my room
so pretty much the next day me and richie get together and make an informed decision that our experiment
was a miserable failure and that we should steal another car as soon as humanly possible
the next day i start calling everyone in my phone to see whos around and who can hang out
but nobody answers and idk if theyre not off yet or busy or whatever but after awhile
i go through my old stuff and root out their like land lines and call a few people that way but
mostly i get their parents of course cuz theyre the only ones who still use land lines basically
and the ones who answer are pretty weird to me for the most part which i can pretty much understand
cuz probably the last they heard of me was before i went to fairview and the whole gun thing but
i leave messages with them for charlie and chris and dan but i dont get anything back and im starting
to get kind of bummed out but i call gregs house and the old answering machine picks up and i try leaving this
really like fake-cheery message and greg picks up halfway through and im super-psyched but his voice is quiet
and weird like hes trying not to be heard or something and he just tells me to meet him at the kwik fill later on which is cool
so i go out and walk over and hes hanging outside and its awesome to see him and we go in and buy red bulls
greg tries to buy smokes but they card him which is bizarre to me cuz im used to fairview by now and like
drinking 40s and smoking weed as if it wasnt anything at all and greg asks me what its like there and i tell him that stuff
and he kind of cant believe how awesome that sounds and it makes me feel really cool until
i think about what was all going through my head the other night about the lines and the screens
but i dont tell greg any of that stuff just how i broke into the locked door with my id and he thinks thats super-cool
and i feel pretty badass so i tell him about richie and stealing the truck which also totally impresses him
but he thinks richie sounds like a total dick which i guess i can understand from the way i described him
so i try to like explain why hes cool to hang out with sometimes but i dont think greg totally buys it
and he talks a little about how it seems like since i went to fairview im actually getting wasted a lot more and
doing like more illegal shit rather than less but i say that although it seems like that
the good part is that i totally dont feel like bringing a gun to school anymore and his face gets weird
and we talk about that for a little while and greg explains that he didnt want his folks to know we were
gonna hang out cuz they were pretty freaked out by the gun thing and a lot of the other parents were too
especially after salinas and stuff and thats probably why the other guys werent calling back or whatever
not cuz they didnt wanna hang but cuz of their folks and whatnot and im like i guess i can understand
but its still me im still the same dee dee and greg goes
-dee dee- all quizzical and i forgot for a second but i
dont want to go into the whole richie thing again so i just go –forget it- and he looks at me weird again
but drops it anyway and i just ask him what hes been doing and we start talking about girls for awhile
and gregs dating this girl nicole who i always thought had great tits and hes like yeah
but theyre actually kind of floppy and almost too big and i go totally serious -no such thing- and he laughs
and it almost feels like before for awhile and we keep walking and he talks about these world war 2 games
hes really into and anime and shit and its okay but then i notice where we are cuz weve been walking
and i realize were at my old school his school and i look at it and greg kind of fades out and i zone into this weird thing
that i totally would never think of normally but there was this retarded girl there i never knew her name
she was total special ed short bus and the other guys used to make fun of me cuz every time shed see me in the hallway
shed giggle and hide her face and go –desmond- in this weird high pitched retardy voice and theyd all
imitate her and talk about how she was my girlfriend and id get super-pissed and tell them all to fuck off
but i never did it like loud or anything cuz she was just a retard and i didnt want to make her feel bad
you know i figured it was hard enough to be retarded and to have people making fun of you all the time
and i realize as we walk by the school that i was never going back there
thered be no way theyd ever let me go back there and i would never see that retarded girl again and i dont know why
but it makes me like super-sad to think of it and thats just stupid shes just a retard why would i care
but i do and it makes me angry and sad at the same time and i keep trying to focus back on greg
and the shit that hes talking about but i just cant get my head around the fact
that some weird part of me actually misses that retarded girl and im angry and sad that i dont know her name
everybody gets sent home over christmas if they have homes to go to and it feels really great and exciting at first
all of us riding together in the fairview van even though richie got put on a train out of town so im with frejean and justin
and some of the other guys but everyones being cool cuz theyre all basically happy to go home so its pretty rowdy and fun
and its snowing lightly and its making me feel christmassy inside even though thats totally pussy but i actually end up being the first
to be dropped off and we pull up and i can see a tree with lights through the front window and with snow everywhere my house seems
totally weird to me like a place i lived once in a dream or something and my mom comes out to the van and signs the clipboard
and gives me a huge hug and i walk with her to the front door then the van drives off and she asks how things are
and i tell her that things are going good and she says
–good- and then we walk inside and its really warm like too warm
and my mom calls out to my dad that im home and hes in the other room watching tv and he calls out –good-
and my mom takes me to the kitchen and we sit at the breakfast bar and eat my favorite pizza from molinas and she drinks a glass
of wine and i have pepsi and she doesnt talk much but she smiles at me a lot and i smile back and when im done
she takes me up to my old bedroom and she opens the door and all the lights are on and its cleaner than its ever been
and theres other stuff thats different too but my mom looks at me funny and asks
–good- and i nod and she tells me goodnight
and dont stay up too late and i go in and look at my dvds and all the horror movies are gone and basketball diaries and
ichi the killer and some other stuff thats not even violent she left full metal jacketwhich is weird but whatever and then
i look at my cds and theres a lot gone there too all the rap stuff marilyn manson spider babies even kill taker
which i guess she took because of the name cuz theyre like totally positive and straight edge but whats weird is that i didnt notice
right away that my laptops gone and i kind of freak out quietly for awhile but then i figure out theyre probably just gonna
monitor me on their pc downstairs so i go down to see if i can get on and i guess my mom went to bed
and i look in the living room and my dads asleep in front of espn and i walk up to him and look down at his face
his eyes are closed and his mouth is open and i think about turning off the tv but hes got a death grip on the remote
anyway im afraid hed wake up if i turn it off so i look at the tv and back at him for a little while
then i go back up to my old bedroom and read this choose-your-own-adventure that i liked when i was 8 until i fall asleep
the next morning it snows for the first time this year and its weird cuz
everyones obviously kind of excited but acting like they dont care about something as gay as the first snowfall
but it definitely brings up all those little kid feelings of like snowmen and days off and christmas morning
and everyones rushing to get outside much more than usual and i run into richie and im like -hey its snowing-
and hes all blasé-blasé like
-hm oh really- and then i go -i was looking for you last night where were you-
and he gives me this weird face -i was in my room what do you mean- and i tell him -i came down cuz
-i wanted to talk to you about something- and he laughs in a strange way -well idk what to tell you dee dee
-i was in my room all night- and i go -well when i came down- and he blows up
-jesus what am i yr boyfriend
-maybe i was taking a shit what the hell- and i go
-whatever man dont have a fucking conniption- and he scoffs
-dont worry about me dee dee- i stare at the floor -i wont- then he sighs -so what was this
-huge important thing you just had to tell me about last night- and im like -nothing dont worry about it-
richie changes tacks on me
-aw cmon dee dee dont be that way tell me all about it- and frejean passes us in the hall
-whats the matter faggots outta lube- and laughs to himself richie waves him off without even looking -fly away shitbird-
frejean makes cocksucking sounds and richie just gives him the finger -cmon dee dee im listening- and im like
-forget it
-lets just go to school- and richie shrugs and we leave the dorm and start walking over and a bunch of guys
are already out there having a snowball fight and theyre whooping and shouting and running
and honestly it looks super fun and i stop and look for a minute and then richies all
-dee dee are you coming-
and for a second i almost say -no im gonna get in on this- but i look over at him and hes all impatient
i look back again and i shrug and just follow him over to the school and we pass the wall by the cafeteria where the graffiti was
and nulles and cuddy are out there watching the physical plant guys finish the sandblasting before the snow gets too bad
and we walk by and richie gives them a jaunty wave and nulles just stares at us with his weird mouth all tight but
cuddys got that same little smile and strange excited look about the eyes that he got with richie when the graffiti first went up
and they just stand there and watch us until we go in the school again just like last time the lines of our
lives running back and forth over each other crossing and recrossing again and again and again and again
so of course i have to look up
krol anyway and theres
nothing in the fairview
library of course but i
go online and i figure if i
look hard enough i can find
something real on krol
because if i look hard enough
i can find women fucking
barnyard animals for
chrissakes but the weird thing
is that its pretty much just
like what richie said
every entry on him in the
webstapedia and other sites
starts off with –discredited
social scientist stanislav krol-
or –disgraced
-social scientist stanislav
krol- like they all kind of
copied off each other or
something and they talk some
about his studies of cult
behavior
but mostly its about his work
with patients taking
psilocybin mushrooms in
controlled conditions and
they make him sound like
some sort of crazy hippie
burnout or something but
they dont talk at all about soft
controls or what it means so
then something
interesting happens cuz i go
looking up soft controls and
its all like really positive
and talking about marketing
and advertising and
social media business
applications and a lot of other
terms that mean like
absolutely nothing to me but
they dont mention krol at all
or fairview or any of the
schools like it so i wonder
about the connection that
richies making like if theres
no one else making it
is it real but then i look up
nlp finally after my earlier
aborted stoned attempt and
again its all this positive stuff
about
social media marketing
strategies and i thought nlp
was kind of sinister the way
that richie described and the
way that crisis staff
use it to like totally
manipulate you in this really
weird way so you dont know
that theyre doing it and then
suddenly it was like
there was the story that the
words on the screen were
telling but then there was
like this other story that was
being told
between the words if that
makes any sense like the
parts that theyre leaving out
and the things that i saw and
felt were combining in this
weird way
that i never really
experienced before and i
started having this experience
like i was high but i wasnt
high like i could totally
still control where my mind
went even though i felt really
like elated and stuff and im
rising up out of my body
almost
and im looking down at me at
the computer in my room and
then i rise higher
and im above the dorm but i
can still see me inside and
then these like lines start
appearing where i go
to the school then back to the
dorm then back to the school
and its like the same closed
path
every single day and the lines
just go back and forth over
each other again and again
and again
so that it seems like my
whole life is just one thick
line between two or three
points really
but then i rise higher and then
theres like this big spike out
where richie and me stole the
truck
we drove to white rock
and drove around and came
back and i realize that
that line out is the only real
deviation from this ridiculous
back and forth straight line
life
that i lead that we lead at
fairview just school to dorm
to school to dorm and then
when we get there its all
screens
like my computer screen and
the 52 inch flatscreen and my
ipod screen and the smart
boards they use at school
and then it gets a little scary
for awhile because that seems
really unreal to me and kind
of fucked up so then im back
in my body
at the computer screen and i
get up and turn it off cuz
honestly im a little grossed
out and i go down the hall
to talk to richie about it but
hes not there the room is
empty and im pissed cuz im
having
what i think is an epiphany
like isaacs is always on about
with those jack london short
stories
he makes us read but anyway
hes not there and i go down
the hall to the common room
and
theyre playing pimptastic 2
and smoking bud but i am so
not into that at this minute
and justins in there
and i consider talking to him
about it cuz he can be cool
sometimes but hes totally
slack jawed from the weed
and just
staring at that huge 52 inch
screen and that kinda freaks
me out too so i just end up
finding my way
up to the roof through that
one door that richie showed
me and i end up out there
alone
staring up at the stars and the
satellites for awhile and just
kind of thinking it all through
but
the funny part is when i
eventually get too cold to
deal anymore and i go to
come back in the door is
locked
behind me and i am
completely screwed cuz if i
bang to get someone to let me
in and one of the guys comes
up
theyre gonna know about it
then and wanna come up here
all the time and thatll suck
wildly
and if its crisis staff thatll
suck even worse cuz then
theyll lock the door from the
inside and either way
richie will be super-pissed at
me so i just calm myself and i
get an idea and take my
laminated fairview id
and try and slip it between
the door and the frame and
jimmy the lock and it takes
about half an hour
but i finally do it and i almost
shout when it clicks open and
im super-psyched and i feel
like macgyver
but by the time i get back
down to my room the
adrenaline starts wearing off
and its really warm
so i basically just lay down to
crash and i crash hard
